If you ever are having a really good day and are thinking everything is just right, the easiest way to take yourself down a few pegs is to ask a simple question to your health insurance company. Obviously I am lucky to even have health insurance with my genes and to have access to health care in general is more than some will ever know.
But for the most part I would rather chew on broken glass.
But then I realize that chewing on broken glass would most likely send me to the hospital and because I have a certain insurance that every hospital in California hates, my injuries received from chewing on broken glass won't be covered and I will owe another kajillion dollars.
And then I will be penny-less because no one will hire a comedian who talks funny because of the broken glass chewing incident. I will end up being a mime at the beach. And I won't be any good at that because I hate wearing cake makeup in the sun. So I will just be a mime with no makeup and people won't understand that I am a mime and just think I am crazed cat woman minus the cats. The police will be called and when they ask for I.D. I will reach in my pocket and the only thing I will have is my health insurance card. At seeing that I will be sent into such a violent rage that 6 police officers won't be able to wrestle me down. That's when the S.W.A.T. team will be called in and as I am running away, with the six guards still on me I will be shot in the butt (my luck it wouldn't be somewhere cool like the arm or leg) and finally brought down. From there I will be brought to the emergency room.
Do you see?
I can't win.
