Did you know the best donut place in my town is right next to the "Curves" gym for women?
Never question when the man at Albertos (or Hermbertos, Josebertos, Sallybertos) gives you 899 napkins. You might need them when your breakfast burrito explodes onto your lap while you are driving.
If your dogs stands at the closet and barks like there is an axe wielding midget clown, there probably is and you should leave the house and never come back.
Sometimes Verizon does stop working for me.
On the show "Celebrity Fit Club" they are neither celebrities or fit.
If you give a bunch of stuff away to GoodWill, the next day you will be looking for your left handed potato peeler.
