Trick or Dwight Shrute

Mikey the Mummy, Aunt "Dwight Shrute" Judy and Tommy "the bucket head" Plunkett.

The CCD Kids Wrote My Name On The Wall

And they didn't even cross the "T"

Shank Your Baby: A Step By Step Pictorial Tutorial

HAPPY 46th WEDDING ANNIVERSARY TO MY FAVORITE MOM AND DAD!

Your kids are cute, well, one out of three ain't bad.

Larry Van Pelt...You Are A Genius!

You are my favorite artist. EVER!

Oshkosh On My Mind

I don't crash weddings, I crash wedding party pictures.

The man in the front row of my show pushed himself backwards until he was safety away from me tonight...I wonder how many letters tonight will generate. We know at least one, I'm going to write an angry letter on front row exit etiquette.

Fr. Carl really needs a Rhoomba.

McGavin and McDonald Ministering to Gods people, more specifically ministering to 1/2 naked homeless construction workers.

What is A Hill-Billy?

Birds Eye

My buddies at Continental flew me to see some of the fires from the sky. Unfortunetley we forgot to land back in San Diego, we kept going to Houston and then they tricked me again and said I was getting on a flight back home but when I got off the plane I was in Wisconsin. Good on ya Continental, so funny!

Hey!

I Thought I Was Performing!
Who's this "world famous comedian" person you speak of?
No pressure.

When Did My Nephew Make This Commercial?

God Can See My House From Here.

This morning, I was one of the last customers through our Starbucks in Vista before they shut it down. When the money grubbing Starbuck Coffee people shut down, it's serious.

Looking outside today it looked like dusk but really it was just after 12pm. It looks like Scotland, but instead of clouds filled with water they are filled with deadly smoke. Same, but different.

I left my house because it sits in a valley and the smoke and ash which sits in said valley just doesn't agree with my asthma. "Sucks to your asthmar!"

The local news (which when I watch it for more than 10 minutes makes me want to gouge my eyes out) said the fire closest to my house won't be contained till a week from Thursday...um, that doesn't work for me. I'm real busy then, real busy, many things planned, like, things, which I am very busy doing.

If I relied just on the graphics from my local news station...I would think I was on fire...not to scale. I also just heard that Pala casino is open...that's my kind of evacuation shelter. Buffets and slots.

I'm going to go do jumping jacks outside now, it's a new way to slowly enter into redemptive suffering.

Trevor Time

We had a Trevor day today!

Said Trevor is a San Diego Padre. Mikey and Trevor's dog, Bubba.

My dad proposing to Trevor and Tommy on base after his totally awesome base hit.

I let Trevor give a message to Tommy...I am the favorite aunt for a reason!

P.S. California is on fire! So far we have friends in Malibu and in Ramona who were evacuated from their homes. Driving back home from L.A. tonight we could see flames from the freeway in Irvine. Instead of snow days, tomorrow is a fire day for many school districts because of poor air quality and the fact that a giant ball of fire being fueled by Santa Ana winds is roaring towards them...what time do the locust get here?

GODPARENTS!

If my parents kick, these two are in charge of me. Poor people.

Comedian Judy McDonald, 31, Chokes and Dies on a Hot Dog

If the plane I was on tonight crashed and burned while going over the Bayou the paper would have read,
'Comedian Judy McDonald dead at 30'
but if I choke and die on a hot dog tomorrow it will say, 
'Comedian Judy McDonald, Dead at 31.'

This us why there will be no hot dogs served at my birthday party.  I take no chances!  

Happy Birthday Jessica Roloff!

She is the funniest person I know...look, she made Mikey laugh so hard that he, well, pulled a Chewie. Hooray for inside jokes!

Random Picture #4456 From Europe That I Wasn't Ready to Share Untill Now

Date taken: Saturday, September 29, 2007

Location: Coffee Shop at the London Stansted Airport

Wha's A Happening: I sat down with this random couple (who happen to be English) while waiting for my ride and starting talking to them like they were my long lost parents who had sent me away to boarding school in America and now I was returning and it was going to be awkward for them to explain me to their friends after all these years.

Why you should care: They played along with me and didn't try to rob me or convert me to the Church of England.

No, I mean really, does anyone really read this blog other than your parents and your 3 friends (2 who are imaginary)? Well, you are reading it...Hi mom, I'm fake engaged!

Thank you for letting me share, that was extremely difficult, but I feel much better now.

The Engagement Photo

On the week before I turn another year older I had this photograph taken of me and my fake fiancé, Philip and his (oh!) parents, Prosper (a.k.a. Mr. Cool) and Bev. I will submit it to our local paper where our fake engagement ad will be placed for our fake wedding. I was very young when I said I would be married by now. I just don't want to upset little Judy, so please don't tell her it's all a sham. We are very cute though!

But I mean, come on, I'm cute even standing next to a baby and a puppy sharing an ice cream cone!

The Hit Song the Day You Were Born

October 18 1976 ... "If You Leave Me Now" by Chicago
Just my luck and I miss "My Ding-a-Ling" by 4 years!
GREAT! Can't I ever catch a break! How long must I endure this suffering?!?!

Log's are people too Ken!

I Hope The Bear Does Not Die on My Watch

The bear gets out more than me. I mean really.

I heard a joke Today....oh, that sounds funny.

That's Captain Flat Teddy to You!

Game, Set, and Match

I'm not sure if Flat Teddy (a distant cousin to Flat Stanley like Celebration Station is in relation to Chuck E. Cheese) is suppose to be an actual popularity contest when you are in second grade.

But if it is, my nephew Mikey is SO gonna win!

FLEMISH

Wakey, wakey

I woke up this morning and for a good 30 seconds had no idea where I was.
I heard my phone ringing and thought, "whoa, my phone isn't suppose to work in London, that's weird, I don't think I'm in London."
One eye open, "this ain't London! This ain't Germany and I ain't home...holy sweet mother where am I?"

I am in America...no wait, I am in Texas.

Texas..Hook em Aggies, no wait Gig em Horns.

Mon the Hoops!

A Sink in Belgium

When you sit the angel stares at you. Not in a demeaning or judging way just a staring creepy angel way.

God Save the Queen (why, was she choking or something?)

Had an awesome time in Dirty Ol London today with my friend Micah. I saw Big Ben, rode the tube and met these people who had no idea how silly they looked in their wigs. Now I am back in Germany packing a months worth of stuff before my flight home tomorrow morning. Those 2 days at home are going to be lovely, but then I will leave again for 2 weeks. I don't want to but I am under contractual obligation (my parents don't like me to stay for more than 2 days in a row.)