Monday, July 07, 2008

ATTENTION

Have you or a loved one recently lost a shoe? Because my mom found one and it's really put a cramp in her style. Today I came home and found a brown sandal in my room. It actually frightened me because at first I thought some assailant had broken into my room (not the house, just my room) and had taken off just one shoe and was trying on my clothes in another room. Either that or I thought the one legged man at my church finally wanted to answer my questions I had about his shoe buying tendencies.
But I was wrong. My mom simply found this brown sandal under our guest room (which we call grandma's room, even though grandma lives in heaven with Jesus and every dog I ever owned) under the bed. Just like every other thing that is found in our house that does not have a specific resting place it gets sucked into the vortex that is my room. "What's this Barbie head doing on the floor? Oh, must be Jude's." OK, bad example. But you get the idea, whatever s floating around eventually ends up in my space. My cell. My crib.
That is the main reason why I was scared when I gazed upon the shoe because I thought my mom might have found a homeless man and mistakenly put him away in my room.
So please, if you have stayed in our house in the last year and you have lost a sandal please inform us so it can leave my room. Even if you were not an invited guest and just happened to break in to take a nap let us know, that's not as creepy as coming home to articles of clothing, wigs and Barbie heads stacked up in my room.