Sunday, January 02, 2005

I'll Sit On Your House

I have been House sitting a lot; it's kind of my day job. It's fun to see how the other half lives...those who don't live with their parents. It really not that hard, it's almost like acting. You take the roll on as a home owner and a pet owner. It's like your getting paid for playing house.

Your relationship is always different with the people after you house sit for them. Maybe you've found something you know they would just die if they knew you saw. Or even better they have a horrible disgusting secret and they think you found it when really you just clogged their downstairs toilet.

I house sit a for my uncle and he has these two little poodles. They are older dogs and they bark at anything that moves. Late at night I often think, what good are they if someone breaks in? In the middle of the night the man with an axe and a hockey mask breaks in looking to fill his monthly killing quota of, these little furry hamsters aren't going to help me . If anything they are going to make the crazy killer's job easier by barking till he finds us in the huge house.

House sitting with big dogs doesn't give me anymore peace of mind. Last night I was watching tv in the house in Fallbrook, no neighbors for miles, no curtains nothing but groves and axe wielding midget clowns. The two big dogs started to growl and bark at the closet. I think they do it just to mess with my head so I went to bed. This morning when I woke up I found a midget clown outfit and a bloody axe outside my room. Ok not really, but that would be really scary if that happened...can you imagine? House sitting in Fallbrook!